Country’s First Defense
It turns out that our last defense against a potential alien invasion is in danger of going extinct. No more spiffy shoes, no more aliens. All the aliens planning to invade us have been taken to the shoe shiners instead.
Who knew the key to saving humanity from enslavement was ensuring everyone wore shiny shoes? So, if you want to help protect the world from alien invasion, get your shoes shined! Let’s hope that aliens don’t figure out that they need this.
